Jeff Mach Writes

June 22, 2024 / Jeff's Writing

Ancient Alien Pickup Lines

Your weirdly-empty and oddly hieroglyph-less, intimidatingly Cyclopean, Sphinx-guarded enormous energy source masquerading as a…

June 20, 2024 / Jeff's Writing

We’re sorry about these poemettes We write them with many regrets We’d write something real,…

June 19, 2024 / And I Was Tired

Once upon a time, there was a monster who devoured every story which began with…

June 18, 2024 / cryptid

My Time Machine is broken again It only takes me to Otherwhen When I clearly…

June 17, 2024 / Jeff's Writing

Once you’ve kissed a Megaladon, You’re not likely to be moving on; They lack lips,…

June 15, 2024 / Elves

The Dwarven King in no Palace lives, Has no soft bed for sleep. The Dwarven…

June 14, 2024 / Bestiary

I must inform you, with watery regrets: Aboleth make terrible pets. And they’re sure…

June 13, 2024 / alternative history

7. Seven Serpents (in Myth, they’ll be called Dragons, but these are not mythical flying…

June 12, 2024 / Bestiary

Awakened Shrub The Awakened Shrub, the Manual states Is a Shrub that some crazed Wizard…

June 10, 2024 / Jeff's Writing

We Villainpunks, we did it all. We’re the reason your favorite show was cancelled. No,…