Jeff Mach Writes

March 15, 2026 / Bestiary

Pickup Lines For A Giant Mutant Alien Praying Mantis

Admit it. You’ve dreamed about this more than you admit. “In the vast silence of…

March 14, 2026 / Jeff's Writing

We’re all doomed; might as well drink. We should celebrate! Might as well drink. We…

March 13, 2026 / And I Was Tired

12. A great deal of book money goes to writers, who are just going to…

March 11, 2026 / alcohol

“Why is it, when they speak of the history of the City of Blood, no-one…

March 10, 2026 / Jeff's Writing

YES. Obviously. You’re wonderful. You’re fantastic. You’re laudable. You’re meritorious. You’re to be congratulated on…

March 10, 2026 / And I Was Tired

When the Moon hits you, regardless of whether it resembles a food group, you are…

March 8, 2026 / And I Was Tired

The third spell (not that everything within is a ‘spell) inside the Necronomicon is a…

March 5, 2026 / Jeff's Writing

They had prepared themselves for battle with the Lich. They were under no illusions that…

March 5, 2026 / dungeondoggerel

On Ankhegs Good things to say about ankhegs: They have fairly lank legs They’re flexible…

March 4, 2026 / dragons

I, Once there was a Dragon who ate everyone in the Kingdom and slept with…