Always Buy The Puck A Drink

Always buy the Puck a drink
Avoid Oberon
Do not at Titania wink
Until her consort’s gone.

Always buy the Puck a drink
Always toast the Moon
Kind words turn Peaseblossom pink
(She is inclined to swoon.)

Always buy the Puck a drink
Tell jokes to Mustardseed
Always live upon the brink
And smoke Hobbit-weed.

Always buy the Puck a drink
but please, my love, be wary
You might lie down in human lands
But then wake up in Faerie.


It occurs to me that in the past fortnight, I’ve written of Fairytale endings gone awry, being exiled from Faerieland, how Elves are jerks, and a certain admiration for Orcs. I suppose, at this point, you might ask, “Jeff, which Elves hurt you? It’s okay, you can tell me,” and I’d reply,

All of them, and they know what they did.”

But I loved them once; and while that love’s gone to vinegar and acid, I still remember happier times. And most of all, it’s hard to stay mad at Puck.

This was going to be an introduction to this piece, but I thought all this was rather heavy for a silly, wistful little poem. So I put it down here at the bottom.

I wrote a book. There’s a lot of philosophy, and a certain amount of bitter humor, and every damn word of it is true. It’s called “There and NEVER, EVER BACK AGAIN: Diary of a Dark Lord”, and it lives over here on Amazon.

Jeff Mach Written by:

“There and NEVER, EVER BACK AGAIN: Diary of a Dark Lord” is the first novel by Jeff Mach, playwright, event creator, and certified Villain. If you'd like to meet Jeff Mach, or if you're simply a Monstrous Creature yourself, you should come to Jeff's new event, Evil Expo.

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