Jeff Mach Writes

January 4, 2026 / (unginged)

Soylent Green Is Delicious, Environmentally-Friendly, Ethically-Sourced Plant Protein. Honest.

SPOILER ALERT: If you’re not familiar with the movie “Soylent Green” (or Harry Harrison’s original…

January 4, 2026 / dragons

Dragon, Dragon, for you, careful words Sky-terror, gold-nesting, Humans are but herds Hotter than heat…

January 2, 2026 / dwarf humor

Dwarven pickup lines? Do you have ANY idea how many Dwarven bars we had to…

January 2, 2026 / humoresque

I’ve refused to be anybody’d pawn I’ve written my own Necronomicon Invisible demons, I’d rather…

December 31, 2025 / Bestiary

There’s a goblin in the closet There is a goblin on your arm. There’s a…

December 29, 2025 / Jeff's Writing

Hey, “I HATE Your Prophecy” is free for a few more hours! Get it at…

December 28, 2025 / alternative history

A Note From Jeff Mach: These are a bunch of highly ridiculous little science fiction…

December 26, 2025 / (unginged)

“I really am terribly sorry about this,” said the Senior Dryad, Noma. Dwarves are not…

December 25, 2025 / Elves

They might be mean They might be faulty Those damn Elves Might be downright salty.…

December 25, 2025 / (unginged)

The good news is, Sam was neither roasted nor eaten, AND the remaining talking pigs…