I fooled around with a Bloodletter of Khorne
One dismal, grey, burning morn
We both got into it. It wasn’t odd
When he shouted, “Blood for the Blood God!”
Don’t ask what I did next unlock
When I replied with, “Souls for Arioch!”
* * *
Fear ye: The Awakened Shrub!
A terribly deadly little nub!
With its tiny brushes, it really ankles
It might even bruise your sensitive ankles.
* * *
The Bearded Devil, somewhat weirdly
Has an attack that’s largely beardy
Furthermore, this ruddy knave
Might poke you fatally with his glaive
Now the glaive is taller than an Orc;
It’s a battle-worthy fork
(Be glad we’ve lost the ancient runes
For constructing Battle Spoons.)
But back (briefly) to the facial hair:
It’s got dexterity to spare
I have no guesses, in particular
About this eccentricity follicular.
So your beard’s a tentacle, basically
And you fight with cutlery?
To your designers, I say: cripes!
Please share the contents of your pipes.
* * *
Some people call me the Space Cowboy,
Some people call me Maurice
You can call me whatever you might like
As long as it’s not “cockatrice”.
Why not buy my books? Amazon.com: Jeff Mach
