Honestly, I’d trade this speakeasy
For writing terrible poetry;
If that works for you, that works for me;
Here’s the Hat,
the Glove,
and the Key.
(Dedicated to V.)
If you ever worry that some of our depictions of things of legend and myth are terrifying, Humans made the Gods, or so they believe. (Don’t listen to the older Gods, who say they made Humans; they were very arrogant before Science, and now that they’ve been proven right on a few things, they’re very, very arrogant indeed.
Elves are nice for the same reason cats are nice: it would be inconvenient to kill you in your sleep.
Bigfoot has tiny feet and huge hands. That’s why he never lets himself be photographed.
If the Force is equally light and dark, why does the Light keep winning?
Santa is real. On the other hand, I have no documentary evidence that you exist.
Villainpunk doesn’t always mean you ARE Villain. Sometimes, you just have too much style for a human.
Capes are not required, but people send a whole lot of time talking about how impractical they are and how there may not be enough throats.
(Poor Caligula.)
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www.patreon.com/thatjeffmach has lots of free content.
You can also pick up my books and audiobooks under “Jeff Mach” on Amazon and Audible.
I’m offline today. I apologize if you reach out and I’m not responsive.
~Jeff
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