Chapter Chicken Liver and Assorted Seafood: A Note On Cats, Thinking, And Mistakes

(Definitely not written by my black cat, Salem.)

Goblins have some Gods
Both Ma’at and Tiamat
This is either because we’re philosophically profound
Or we’re idiots with brains like the one of a cat.

But dividing the world into ‘Good’ and ‘bad’ oft risks ambiguity
Which is bad when laws and traditions
Switch back and forth most fluidly!

Good things don’t always come in ones or twelves
And one good thing is that we have Elves
Whose morals are on unreachable shelves
(Unreachable by us, and even by themselves.)

They teach us that certainty and arrogance
Go hand-in-glove with making no sense.
The aforementioned ambiguity
Seeks you out with great acuity.

So we thought of a compromise.
A thought, a gift, O bless your eyes,
And the Gods (to whom we’re often listening)
Didn’t want to get blood on their clothes (which are glistening.)

(Their former slaves leaving,
With helpful documentation,
Which granted manumission
And warned humans they’d be fools without submission.)

But these documents were discarded;
No seasoned veteran trusts the Elves’ own direction and be-spelling,
Unless they’re sure the lie they’re a-telling
Is something which aligns  with their wants,
and some negativity-quelling.

Part II.

Those Gods claim they made cats,
To spy on Humankind
They left out: visit the Gods,
And the same staring thou shalt find.

Turns out that evens superheroes (except maybe Bats)
Are nearly as clueless as Elves, or Cats,
And we’re more clueless. Elves are smarter.
(And thus more inclined to be tearers-aparter.)

Even if you’re smart, give yourself the precious treat:
Give up your brains like a Vegan with meat.
Sometimes realize: ALL are fools.
This fact is a FEATURE. Failures are TOOLS.

No-one, no-one likes to fail
To strain to work, or sleep, or make bail.
But nobody’s right at every single moment
So this idea we’d like to foment:

The next time you do something really idiotic
Recognize that idiocy and smarts are symbiotic.
You can’t be smart without sophisticated errors…

…so let them be lessons.
Don’t let them be terrors.

 

____________

 

To beta-read the new book, email jeffreypetermach@gmail.com

Jeff Mach Written by:

Jeff Mach is an author, playwright, event creator, and certified Villain. He'd love for you to check out patreon.com/jeffmach for his favorite work (it's almost all free!) He's currently working on the Great Catskills Halloween Vendor Market and The Big Dark Lord Dwarf Novel. You can get his last novel, "I HATE YOUR Prophecy", or his increasingly large selection of other peculiar books of shortt fiction. If you'd like to talk more to Jeff, or if you're simply a Monstrous Creature yourself, stop by @darklordjournal on X or The Dark Lord Journal on Facebook.

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