My Time Machine is broken again
It only takes me to Otherwhen
When I clearly set it for Neverwhere
(At times when I am never there.)
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Pigs don’t supply pork for pork and beans
They know the secrets of Soylent Greens…
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I stubbed my toe on the cabin’s first level
And ran into the Jersey Devil
It consumed both my feet
So I felt quite incomplete
And could no longer dance at the revel.
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Your destination
Is a hallucination.
It’s no twist,
You just don’t exist.
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Let’s drink a toast
To liquified toast!
Melted with butter
And your now-late host.
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There once was a spy named Bond
Whom with spy-girls did often abscond….
…you know, we’ll leave the rest of this out,
just to be on the safe side.
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We would all mourn their untimely passin’s
But they did piss off the Guild of Assassins
So their deaths aren’t exactly unexpected
(Their tombstones conspicuously un-erected.)
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Let none forget the Guild of Thieves,
The Guild in whom no-one believes.
Why is that? I think I’ll call it:
They’ll disappear your witness…and your wallet.
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They say a TARDIS is bigger
On the inside than on the out
As for my Mobius TARDIS,
I’m probably just a lout.
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Dogs are perky,
Cats are sly,
Beholders blink
And then you die.
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My name is Jeff Mach (“Dark Lord” is optional) and I build communities, put on events, and make stories come into being. I also tweet a lot over @darklordjournal.
