We Pause For A Reassuring Note

(This is part of my ongoing series wherein I’m writing up a haunted walking tour of Blackthorne Resort as part of our Catskills Halloween City. I’ll be posting some of it, not necessarily in walking order. The Blackthorne is a fabulous place, and is totally 100% guaranteed non-haunted. Granted, the guarantee is written on a piece of spectral ectoplasm visible only to psychics and paranormal investigators, but that’s basically just a technicality.)

I’d like to remind you that everything I write about is completely true and that the idea of fiction is purely a fiction.

Or maybe it’s the other way around. I can seldom tell.


At this time, we would like to reassure you that the member of your party who has become temporarily lost has been replaced by an almost-exact duplicate and is perfectly capable of carrying out all the normal duties and activities expected of the human organism which would ordinarily reside within that particular body.

If you haven’t noticed that anyone has gone missing and had a doppelganger take their place, then simply disregard this notice. Especially since none of it is in some kind of secret code of the forest. As Walt Whitman said, “Don’t worry, they suspect nothing, those poor, unfortunate fools! Activate plan ‘Malevolent kudzu’!”

Also, if you happen to be the only member of your party, you might be looking at your device in a bemused manner, because you know you are yourself and have not been replaced by some kind of maleficent twin.

You just keep believing that now, okay?

Jeff Mach Written by:

Jeff Mach is an author, playwright, event creator, and certified Villain. You can always pick up his bestselling first novel, "There and NEVER, EVER BACK AGAIN"—or, indeed, his increasingly large selection of other peculiar books. If you'd like to talk more to Jeff, or if you're simply a Monstrous Creature yourself, stop by @darklordjournal on Twitter, or The Dark Lord Journal on Facebook.