A Mermaidenly Misconception

Many people have the unfortunate misconception that Sirens lure sailors to their deaths.

Most of the people who’ve resisted this myth have done so unhelpfully. For example, we often hear that Sirens simply aren’t real. Now, that’s not true at all. You might just as well say that Summer storms aren’t real. Oh, they’re rare and they’re dramatic, in this part of the world, but they’re as real as wind and rain and the glint of the Sun off the low tide just before you ram into one of those huge stone pillars which used to be the teeth of Giant Mermen, back in the days of the True History.

You’re familiar with Sirens, right? Traditionally considered creatures of Evil? Said to be beautiful women, generally assumed to be Mermaids, who lured Sailors to their deaths?

Yeah. Not true. Not true at all.

You might have heard that Sirens sing out with beautiful, irresistible voices which summon ships to their doom and sailors to their deaths?

Not true.

It’s just the ships.

Oh, sure, the sailors THINK it’s them. And they get excited. Sirens ARE lovely. It might not be so bad, to die for something that beautiful.

And then, as the ships begin to founder on the rocks, the sailors notice:

Those sirens aren’t even looking at them.

No, they only have eyes for the ships. And vice-versa. And that’s extra strange, because you could’ve sworn ships don’t HAVE eyes.

But that’s a pretty trivial point.

There may actually be words to describe the shock, the heartbreak, the desolation as your vessel is cracking into pieces and the lovely monsters who cause the wreck aren’t even LOOKING at you.

A sailor’s life can be lonely and dangerous. If it has to end, there are worse fates than to be summoned to your end by lovely and captivating supernatural creatures whose entire existence is taken up with waiting for you and causing your cessation.

On the other hand, to be slaughtered because a bunch of utterly-indifferent sea-gropers decided to seduce your SHIP, and the actual SHIP just up and wrecked itself just for a chance to crash on their island…

…why, it would be too much of an indignity to live with!

Fortunately, the sailors didn’t have to.


My name is Jeff Mach (“Dark Lord” is optional) and I write rather a lot of fantasy and science fiction, often (but not always) satire or a bit of dark huYou can get most of my books right here. Go ahead, order I HATE Your Prophecy“ It may make you into a bad person, but I can live with that.

Jeff Mach Written by:

Jeff Mach is an author, playwright, event creator, and certified Villain. He's currently working on the Great Catskills Halloween Vendor Market & Spectacle. You can always pick up his bestselling first novel, "There and NEVER, EVER BACK AGAIN", or "I HATE Your Prophecy"—or, indeed, his increasingly large selection of other peculiar books. If you'd like to talk more to Jeff, or if you're simply a Monstrous Creature yourself, stop by @darklordjournal on Twitter, or The Dark Lord Journal on Facebook.