“Those whom the Gods wish to destroy, they first make mad.”
-William Anderson Scott
“I bate it,” said Hera.
“That’s an excellent start,” said Mercury, who then yelped as he dodged a very large lightning bolt. He had completely forgotten that Zeus had made her several for her birthday, and she was less worried about casual murder of other Gods than some people.
“Look, we have to–”
“If I hear you say ‘change with the times’ one more time, I will smack you with this hammer,” said Hephaestus.
“Listen,” said Mercury, his voice the very literal voice of Reason. (It’s a pity that the Gods of Greece are not, necessarily, reasonable, nor do they see need to be.
“It’s true. Once, if you wished to destroy someone, you made them insane. Have them eat their own family, wrestle a lion naked, run up to the steps of the Imperial Palace and declare themselves God-Emperor.
“Nowadays, if you say your family really deserved it, or that the media has blown the God-Emperor story way out of proportion, nobody even cares.”
“The lion cares,” said Heracles, who was not one of the Twelve, but was around anyway, as he often was.
“Yes,” Mercury replied patiently. “But I don’t care about him.”
Mercury had come prepared.
Mercury was frequently prepared.
Mercury had brought with him a huge crystal ball. At an indication of his wrist, two servants wheeled it in.
“Show us the lives of the Humans on Earth at this moment,” said the God of Snakes and Words.
It showed.
And showed.
And showed.
The Gods watched.
Eventually, they started flinching.
Everyone stared at Dionysus.
“They’re completely insane,” said Hestia. “Did YOU do this for some reason?”
But Dionysus was standing there, trembling with anger. And jealousy. Mostly jealousy.
“Who gave them those little screens?” he shouted. “Intoxication is MY business! MINE, do you hear?”
Mercury smiled.
“They did it to themselves,” he said. “We’ve taught them beautifully, I suppose.”
“Surely ONE of them is sane,” said Hestia.
“Oh, plenty of them are sane,” said Mercury. “And let me tell you, they hate it.”
Jupiter nodded.
“So it is decreed henceforth. Those whom the Gods wish to destroy, they’ll first make sane enough to take a good hard look around.”
Everyone nodded.
“The poor bastards,” said Dionysus, quietly.
________________
Comments are closed.