Management is not responsible for ill-considered budget cuts to Reality; Absurdity; Puck; the Third Wave; the Fourth Wall; tulips; the alignment of the Stars; the alinment of the Muffler; the Helm of Opposite Alignment; seeing stars; startling sights; all of the 1970s clothes in your closet leaping out and making you look embarrassingly good; your desire to enjoy yourself; your enjoyment of myself or themselves or any enjoyment which wants to be had; acts of Puck; Puckishness; the Axe of Puck +5; the Law of Fives; the Long Arm of the Law; the way it’s a lot cheaper to make a second Death Star than research and design an all-new galactic murder non-Moon; the Apocalypse; the Post-Apocalypse; the Lack of Apocalypse; the numerous challenges of awakening with a tail; existential crises; non-existential crises; crises of non-existence; every mighty oak tree was once tens of thousands of little acorns of which an incredibly tiny percentage survived to maturity; algebra is contagious; Hope is divided by zero [and if it happened, we didn’t do it]; any incidental taxes, duties, licenses, or fees laid upon you by the Department of David Bowie; flux capacitation; Soylent in any colors or flavors; dimensional rifts, dimensional Riff-Raffs; actions of the Mad God; actions of the merely Very Miffed God; smitings of the Actually Perfectly Fine But One Must Keep Up Appearances God…
…the Management can’t be held responsible, and doesn’t reside on this plane of existence if it could.
My name is Jeff Mach (“Dark Lord” is optional) and I build communities, put on events, and make stories come into being. I also tweet a lot over @darklordjournal.
I write books. You should read them!
