The Myth Of The Catskills Devil: A FAQ

Q: Is the Catskills Devil a myth?
A: You’re thinking about the Jersey Devil. There’s no such thing as the Catskills Devil.

Also, the Jersey Devil is a myth.

Q: Who said anything about the Jersey Devil?
A: Not you, which goes to show that you’re very uninformed. The Jersey Devil is a well-known urban legend, and it has been spotted hundreds of times in the past two centuries; never, however, by reliable witnesses, and, in fact, it’s clear that many of these so-called “sightings” were simply publicity stunts.  The rest were mistakes, or possibly intoxication.
Q:What about the Catskills Devil?
A: The Catskills Devil is, as mentioned above, a myth. You’re thinking of the “Devil Path” of the Catskills, a hiking trail which is extremely difficult and, for a number of reasons, considered particularly fiendish (but, I must hasten to add, only metaphorically so; “fiendish“, as in, those who travel this path find it beset with a number of physical, geographic, literal difficulties which make it extremely challenging; there are no such things as “fiends“.)
Q: So wait, you’re not only telling me that the Catskills Devil is a myth and the Jersey Devil is a myth, but you’re also moving out of the realm of urban legends and straight into the world of theology by declaring all demonic forces to be myths?
A: Not all of them. Gremlins are totally real. Also, to reiterate: there’s no such thing as a “Catskills Devil”, so it can’t be a myth. The “Jersey Devil” is a myth; the “Catskills Devil” isn’t even an idea. Like I said, you’re probably confusing it with a road.
Q: Wait, what’s that about gremlins?
A: It’s not important.
Q: It’s totally important to me. Now I’m interested.
A: Would you please stick to the topic at hand?
Q: Are you sure that this is a FAQ? It seems more like a dialogue. These don’t seem like “frequently asked questions”; this seems more like a conversation. An argument, really.
A: Of course this is a FAQ! It says “FAQ” right in the title, doesn’t it? Now, if you’d kindly get back to asking me about the Catskills Devil, I’d be much obliged.
Q: Okay. Tell me all about the Catskills Devil.
A: Doesn’t exist.
Q: That’s it?
A: That’s the kind way of putting it. To be blunt, you’ve been hoaxed, hooked, rooked, taken for a ride; your trusting and, frankly, gullible nature has imbued someone with the desire to throw you a big ol’ fib, and like a drowning fool who will grab anything thrown their way, even if it’s an eight-ton anchor, you just went right ahead and gave this idea the benefit of the doubt, when anybody with half a brain would recognize that it’s incredibly implausible for some kind of giant, winged, horned creature, something that looks halfway like a Renaissance painting of Satan and a little like the red guy on hot sauce bottles, some weirdly Mephistophilian figure, to just hang around in an area which has been, if not densely populated, certainly inhabited by humans for quite a long time, without anyone getting a reasonable picture, or even having a decently plausible explanation for the supposed existence of such a hypothetically peculiar creature, is beyond idiotic.
Q: Okay. So let me me make sure I’ve got this right. What you’re saying is, this whole thing is clearly stupid, and I shouldn’t have even gone looking for answers, because the Catskills Devil is not a thing, and nobody should believe in him.
A: Her.
Q: What?

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~Jeff Mach is a valuable source of vitamins and minerals.

His Villainpunk novel is “There and NEVER, EVER BACK AGAIN: Diary of a Dark Lord“.

His Villainous Convention is www.EvilExpo.com.

He gains unspeakable understanding within the pages of this ominous grimoire.

 

Jeff Mach Written by:

“There and NEVER, EVER BACK AGAIN: Diary of a Dark Lord” is the first novel by Jeff Mach, playwright, event creator, and certified Villain. If you'd like to meet Jeff Mach, or if you're simply a Monstrous Creature yourself, you should come to Jeff's new event, Evil Expo.

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